things getting out of hand, why is all this nonsense happening to me? can people really be trusted anymore? who's to trust? maybe i have the answer within me but did i really chose this right path, i can't bear to watch myself fall again i don't want to return back to the past, who knows what you've done to me has all this been planned and drawn out already? i feel so damn disappointed now who can give me advice? CORRECT advices, some are just plain dumb kept thinking whether what i'm doing now will bring me up to another stage really can't bear to watch this scenes anymore, i don't want names to be named go on without me, i don't give a damn for you guys anymore, that's what i chosen should all this matters be spoken infront of me ever again? who cares...
have alot of insight information from others, it's like they all come running to me went back to class and many people started telling me plenty of stories, quite fasinating some were quite belivable, some quite funny, some seem so damn true to me felt so disgusted by what they had told me, can't believe i shouted so loud in class anyways, thank you "guys" and i really don't know what should i say to you anymore really feel like giving myself one tight slap, so that i can go back into reality WAKE UP stop day-dreaming already, forget about the past and move on why should you even bother so much at this stage, let time take control over me i don't want to force people anymore, where can the happiness be right now? who cares what's my point of view now, where is it! i'm constabtly searching for it
practically did nothing today in school, history; slept, art; talked, math; touch phone why am i doing all this? i know what will the consequences be if i do not do well what's all that distraction that's distracting me? go away you asshole thought about where i was thinking i want to go after my secondary school studies well i want to pursue interior designing for houses, if not, something relating to music school's first choice, nanyang school of fine arts, if not singapore polytechnic do you even think i would fit in all those courses or even those schools? should i be doubting my abilities, is it too early to let all this speak for itself? don't know why feel so moody all of a sudden when i'm thinking about all this things have i lost faith in myself already, or should i just really just move on and forget who's to blame, guess i should blame myself that i've landed in this stage
anyways aikido last lesson already, really miss those instructors alot! like HELL I LOVE PHILIP, FELIX, GRACE AND JINGJING, such wonderful instructors at least i got a photo of them, well there's just memories within me, i'm satisfied some more got test on thursday, but everyone basically knows how to do everything then i paired up with my sister and we gave way to each other, kind of funny and we did laughed at people, especially when they wanted to test our wrist we basically did push-up infront of them, YAY! i managed to do all of them because we wanted to avoid getting into trouble and we really did have fun that day so got a certificate, still don't get why must they say my full name out!! so embarassing but i really missed them alot, don't think they had scolded us before right? wanted to post their pictures out, but on a second thought, i guess not alright? things start to leave me one by one, even all those that i can't be bothered had left what''s important and what's not, it just feels the same to me no matter what
all this things really does not matter to me anymore, there's this thing i heard learn to forgive and forget, till now i did not forgive her, she caused me too much trouble gave me a big headache and many worries when you had been teaching us, bitch i still wouldn't forget that time when i can't believe i had all those stupid things for you thought back and realised how stupid and gullible i was last time, to believe you still don't know why people still like you alot, stop showing off, it's disgusting what's there to show right? let's not speak about this forever and i mean forever seriously don't you feel hurt at all when you hear all those comments? maybe you just took it as a joke or something that does not matter to you anymore is it really so funny to you, do you know your words are very hurtful? i just kept it inside me, i was wishing one day you would change for the better are all this just false hope that you had given me? stop mocking at others...
can't believe you agreed to everything i said and yet you even commented on it i'm shocked thou, thought you might had rebelled against me or something, oh well what the f*ck, don't know why i gained weight this few days, when is the last time i ran? okay, maybe a few hours ago, don't want to be bothered by weight problems! thought back, wished i could spend more time with you guys! bring laughter to me what did i miss this few months? can all this be brought back to me once more? really like hanging out with you guys, hey you, i heard you said the wrong things should have stopped you earlier, oh come on take that as a compliment will you? don you think you took things too serious for now, it's like a stupid joke get it? seems like i'm constantly asking questions to myself, who can answer that for me made up my mind, i'm seriously not crying for anyone anymore, what for
maybe i had chosen my way out already, should just leave things behind me don't know why my heart feel so "soft" lately, have i been too soft-hearted? pity all kinds of people nowdays, seem very very ridiculous right? i just feel like it it's best if we leave them alone for now, let time take control of us... i just feel like it
Grace Lee. 18 this year. Currently studying in Commonwealth Secondary School. I love my CCA Girl Guides. In class 1/7, 2/7, 3/6, 4/6 5/1.
27th November is my special day. Black freak. I respect all kinds of people, regardless of race or religion. Tend to get worked up whenever I hear the sound of keys ting-a-ling.
Dislike peanut butter or anything that has the word 'nut' in it. Gets high easily. Choose to vent my anger on my blog.
a new hand phone,
more clothes,
crumpler bag,
advance in my allowance,
helix piercing,
tragus piercing,
grow taller,
belt with a guitar buckle,
laptop,
do well in my studies,
new i-pod (black colour),
nike watch,
nike bag,
green/ white/ grey/ black skinny jeans,
pass O level, go poly,
more piercings,
film director,
a camera,
a new camera,
PSP,
HIM