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Sunday, December 24, 2006

Maybe i'm really tired of playing audition at the moment, i'll blog my hearts out. I can't be blogging when my parents come back from their trip. One more day to go before they come back! About audition, maybe i'll just stone at level twelve at the moment, don't want to level too fast anyways. Plus i'm super shagged out this past few days, had been going out and toning. Don't think i've gotten enough sleep, which i usually do. But hey! It's time i get to experience this sort of things. I'll never have the time to do this kind of things after the holidays, need to concentrate more, i regretted doing it in the past.

Who knows? I'll update tomorrow? I may not? Depends on my mood, some are constantly bringing my mood down. But nevertheless, i'll look on the bright side. Nobody's going to make me feel bad or down anymore. I do what i think is right, your opinions don't always seem right to me. So let me just saying something about just now. After i bathed and stuffs, went to youth hope church. Today's venue was at kallang, when i went to jurong east mrt station. Realised that the care group has much more people there than i expected. So took a bus there, and people were handing out gifts on the bus. So i also gave out my presents too, what a feeling. So anyways today's service was quite fun too. Didn't know that joelle, shih han, jonathan, zhaolin, yinhao were coming thou. Scared me when i saw them, but i was quite happy to see some of them. It's been quite some time since i last saw them too.

They had this drama, which is about how god created the things in this world. And how sins had separated us from god. They played some songs there, and i particularly like one song. But i forgot the song title! I'll go find out soon, the song so nice! So i got to know more about god after this service, got this unexplainable feeling. During that time when the pastor told us to put our heads down as he was talking about jesus christ's stuffs. I kept crying for no apparent reason, i'm not kidding, i really cried a lot. Things like this just come to me unexpectally. I agree with what the pastor said, christianity is about having a relationship with god. I hope to have that, forgive me for the sins i've done in the past. I should move on and not think about it anymore, it doesn't do good to anyone. Anyways went to someone's house for bbq after that, sorry i forgot your name. Actually i forgot most of your names, give me time to remember! Sorry sorry!

We took a bus there and that guy's house is super big. And it's three storey some more! We played a lot of games there, in that "special" room which doesn't have any reception at all! Can't receive nor send out sms when i'm in that room. Oh yes, sorry to all those people whom i did not reply your sms-es, maybe about three or four of you. Didn't have the mood to reply any sms-es. And to my sister, told you i got a lot of connections. Just joking. Got to know this eighteen year old girl called joyce tan. Goodness! She damn power! She won me in arm wrestling and a drinking competition. So anyways yongmei, her and i sat in the room and we began to talk about our own personal problems. Got to know more about the both of them, and i realised that joyce tan's advices were unbelivable. I don't know how to reply her questions, thanks by the way. Guess you gave me quite a few options and solutions to my problems. I'll look for you if i have any problems, thanks to yongmei too!

They made me realised quite a few things. I should focus on my studies now, no more distractions. Anyways i realised that many people keep touching my earrings whenever they're looking at me. Happened a lot of times! I like it too anyways. Realised that a girl keep smiling whenever she walk past me. Heard from my sister that she's a real nice person, basically the people there are extremely nice! I had fun lots of fun, hope to continue like that. Work hard, play hard. Still much more places for me to go to, i wanted to be like one of them. I can see it falling once again, i can feel you falling once again. Now watch them disappear, the truth will begin right here. These are the signs of our times, take what you want and leave all the rest. Going to be an emotional person, not going to be like the past old me, where i used to keep quiet doing my stuffs alone. Cry whenever i'm encountering an obstacle, what's with the sudden change?

Infiltrate their trust, then release the lie right between the eyes. Turn around and take my hand, i will never forget so save your hollow regrets. I told you that i would not forget and i will walk away without a regret. Right behind the black door, the silence i remember the very thought of you. In violence i dismember every thought attached to you, lest we speak the more we gain. In the end nothing remains, assume the obvious and don't ask any questions. Everything is wrong expect the devious, then turn and make the call for the blacklist assassin. Beyond all recognition and what is believed, there lies a contradiction. Fading resistance, lights out for the last time. Reach for the promise, hold back the tears. Down on the inside, with nothing left to fear..

All i wanted to do, is to be alone at times and think about what has happened before. It may be temporary, just having random thoughts in my mind. I agree with what you said, it made sense to me. And gave me the courage to face the fact and move on with life. Things are left unspoken inside me..
forgive me for what i've done

3:26 AM





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http://gracehate.blogspot
Grace Lee. 18 this year. Currently studying in Commonwealth Secondary School. I love my CCA Girl Guides. In class 1/7, 2/7, 3/6, 4/6 5/1. 27th November is my special day. Black freak. I respect all kinds of people, regardless of race or religion. Tend to get worked up whenever I hear the sound of keys ting-a-ling. Dislike peanut butter or anything that has the word 'nut' in it. Gets high easily. Choose to vent my anger on my blog.

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