My God, first time ever in history, I didn't update my blog for a week. Happy chinese new year by the way, God bless! It's been a rough week and I know that things are going to get more hectic. Our school celebrated total defence day and our class is supposed to present our animation clip to the entire school. Anyways, woke up at the usual time and then that stupid bus came late. Went to school late by a few minutes and the principal told us to sit in the parade square. So i quickly pulled up my socks and took our my earrings, it's not my fault right? Can't believe I forgot to bring my tie to school again! Someone remind me can? Have to waste money to buy that piece of paper, after that i rushed up to the computer lab to finish up our animation clip.
Just want to say thanks to those who gave me presents! Oh yes, someone gave me my favourite chocolate which is Mars! Thanks a lot, you all know who you are right? I realised something after what I've heard, I realised that these things aren't important now. I don't want to waste my youth on you, somehow I can't be bothered anymore. During that time, you told me that this was coming and yes it did come. It's so stupid to think of it that way, that maybe things would turn out well just this time. You want to think of it that way, I have no choice but to agree with it. I guess yingzhen was right, our chinese teacher had really given up hope on us. At first I didn't agree with it, but after noticing her for some time I suddenly felt it. I don't know how should I feel, be glad that it's all gone? So all of us were so freaked out when we were in the backstage, heard that something fell on shakila's head, ouch. When I walked on the stage, just imagine the sight where the whole school's looking at you, so memorable.
My speech was the longest and adeline said that my expression was like I wanted to laugh, but I hide it one side. Anyways we got the third prize, and when our group's watching our animation clip, i kept laughing and laughing. I realised that I was laughing and tears were falling down at the same time. I'm proud of what our group has done, great job! I love you guys! After school, we went jurong entertainment to eat at KFC. I guess nothing much happened after that, sorry all my memory's very bad. But I did remembered that I went to meet cuizhen after that, and we saw jiahui and joyce tan. Keith and dinesh were so funny! So anyways, I was quite pissed off today all of a sudden, who's being a paranoid now? God create wonders! Tell you all why, we were supposed to run 2.4km on monday and I told yingzhen that I must get 10 and below. So we started to run, I kept running and praying at the same time. I asked God to give me strength to run on and on, and turns out that i got the 10th position and my timing was 12.51 minutes, thank God!
It's so weird, no cca are holding their trainings and yet we still got to hold a training. Quite sad actually, I wanted to go for service and I ended up reaching nexus at directly 5pm. Waited outside for my care group members and then a number with 6 in front was calling me. At first I thought it could be a wrong number, but there isn't any harm picking up the phone right? And guess what? There was a guy's voice over the other line and he said he was from youth.sg. I was like oh my God! He asked me for my NRIC number and my address, cool I just won a voucher. So lucky! Anyways, went to eat dinner and then we went to a place near Lot 1. Played basketball with cuizhen, jingting, jiahui, jia wan and grace. Went home after that, and I did had a lot of fun with those guys. Anyways, sad to see what's been sent to me. Maybe you're right, I shouldn't trust you, so stop bothering me. I told you not to go for it in the first place, then now what? You've gotten yourself into trouble and now you're blaming me just because I refuse to help you? I'm holding it back, I'll lose control someday.
Turned out wrong, I never expected things to be like this. I kept thinking back, is this how you treated me before? What if I agreed to what you said before? Would things be like that? Got to work harder for my chemistry, I scored a B4 for my physics but my chemistry pulled my entire combined science's results down. And that situation applies to my art too, now I guess my grade's a C4? It just came blurting out from my mouth, I don't usually say those kind of things. That only applies when I'm really mad, Lord, I tried to tolerate, please guide me along. You await your final hour with fear you loathe the end of days, i'm still awaiting. Everything I say to you comes from the bottom of my heart, and how did you repay me? What have you ever done for me? I'm here to show them love within, listen to Him speak so holy. Learn to love your enemies, tolerate no matter what. I'm not afraid to stand up, I'm not afraid to stand up for my beliefs. Always did it on my own then one day I realized the true meaning of it. Doesn't matter if you don't get what I say nor interested in what I write, I don't care do you?
I look up to feel the Almighty. Dear Lord, oh how I love You so much, with Your grace that take away the hurt and bruises inside me. Lord You kept me alive and life is never boring with You. The hands of Yours that were being nailed on the cross, You pulled me out of trouble and i'm in doubt. You touch my heart in such a way that all I can do is cry Your name Jesus Christ. My heart aches for Your love, I believe in You and I hope that You can really help me out here. I'm at a loss for words, everything I do now seems to be empty, what did I do and what can I do? Is that what I really want in life? What's my goal? Sudden thoughts coming in here and there. I tried to cry out from the inside, but I guess my soul did not pour itself out enough. Everything was wrong, nothing was right, at least that is what I thought. On the outside it looked fine but no one could tell what's on the inside. Forgive me God for all of these years of my transgressions, I know You can change me and I'm glad I heard you spoke to me. Guide me through all troubles, I need You! In Jesus's name I pray, amen.
No longer keeping quiet, no longer standing still. No longer giving in, no longer going back. I stand strong praying for love always to be in my heart. someone set me free.
Grace Lee. 18 this year. Currently studying in Commonwealth Secondary School. I love my CCA Girl Guides. In class 1/7, 2/7, 3/6, 4/6 5/1.
27th November is my special day. Black freak. I respect all kinds of people, regardless of race or religion. Tend to get worked up whenever I hear the sound of keys ting-a-ling.
Dislike peanut butter or anything that has the word 'nut' in it. Gets high easily. Choose to vent my anger on my blog.
a new hand phone,
more clothes,
crumpler bag,
advance in my allowance,
helix piercing,
tragus piercing,
grow taller,
belt with a guitar buckle,
laptop,
do well in my studies,
new i-pod (black colour),
nike watch,
nike bag,
green/ white/ grey/ black skinny jeans,
pass O level, go poly,
more piercings,
film director,
a camera,
a new camera,
PSP,
HIM